Thursday, November 26, 2009

Simple Social Etiquette Heading for Extinction..

As a person, I have to admit that my human package comes complete with an abundance of flaws; imperfect in my conduct and mannerism at times.  Realizing this fact about me, as a parent now, to 3 marvelous children, I hope I am able to educate them the best way possible not only academically but most importantly in terms of their social etiquette.

Today, I was at the Giant supermarket near my Mam's home with my first two munchkins just strolling along lane after lane.  We were at one isle when this lady took a packet of Maggi to have another fall on the ground.  Did she have any decency to pick it up? The answer is NO! She merely looked at it and scurried away. Since she was able to ignore it, the devil in me took control and told me to do just the same until I was put to shame after Qayyum picked it up and put it back on the shelf.  I thanked my son for his act to which he replied "I didn't make it fall, Mum." I was instantly embarrased at myself because I saw the thing fall first and decided to ignore it while this 7 year-old boy did the total opposite.

 After getting what I needed , as my first two children were with me, I decided to bring them to the playground there that they love so much.  One thing that Iman loves about the playground  is the free rides provided.  First come, first serve is a social rule that I respect and always abide to.  Upon reaching the rides, when things are free, you would see that it is always occupied. Not wanting to see a disappointed look on her face, I stood  right beside that pony she wanted to go on with her, waiting for our turn.   We had been queuing for 15 minutes when the girl who was on the pony finally got the message that the pony was public property, decided to go down and give other sapient a chance on it .  But the best thing that happened Iman was taking her sandals off  to get on it, came another gentleman who conveniently settled his daughter on the pony that we had been waiting for, for a total of 15 minutes (plus another 30 seconds while waiting for her to get the sandals off).  It's not a long period for us adults, but for kids, it seemed forever! So, we had to wait another 5 minutes and  I said mighty loud to Iman "It's ok Baby, kita sabar jer. Tunggu je lagi!! Don't run around, beratur jer macam tadi." I guess that got the man feeling guilty because he started this small conversations asking how old Iman was, where she went to school yadda,yadda,yadda.  Two rounds on the pony later, my gal got her chance which delighted her to the extent that there was no more room on her face for her to be smiling from ear to ear!

My kids have often forgotten to say their "thank yous" to people but my husband and I are always quick to reprimand them fearing it would become a habit hard to break and I get really annoyed at children who don't say it and it gets more annoying when their parents don't even say anything to correct their child!!  Well, for children below 10 years old is fathomable but for those who are above that age just comes across to me as mighty rude.  Saying 'please and thank you' is considered to be the most fundamental aspect of the social etiquette. Why is it that some find it extremely difficult to practise?  I have encountered many situations with cashiers who never say thank you to me when handing in my change and even when I say it to them, sarcastically, they would just give me an insincere smile. These cashiers should be reminded of the fact that the purchasing power of customers are what gives them the salary to enable them to paint their faces with awfully heavy make-up!!  So little girl at the gift shop in Kuantan Specialist Hospital, hope you are reading this and won't forget to say thank you anymore!!! ( I have 'tegur'ed her twice, but you know, if you are just bloody rude, you're just bloody rude!!)

The next issue I would like to touch on is the under usage of saying "excuse me" when you need to interrupt other people's conversation.  I have this colleague who does this on a regular basis.  At first, we thought that she might have done it accidently but when it happened every single time she needed to cut into other people's conversation, definitely it's just her.  Nobody is more important than anybody else when it comes to conversations.  I believe everybody has the right to converse and having said that, even if you feel that one gossiping about Mr. X or Madam Y is just a waste of your precious time to listen to, still, let them finish off their sentence before you decide to butt in with the things you need to say thinking it is more important and above anything else. For starters, you will definitely not fall into your grave by saying "Excuse me, can I interrupt for a while.."

I have never for once felt repulsed to enter a public toilet in  the shopping malls of Belgium or even at Moray House where I was studying. Sadly, that is not the case here.  In Malaysia, how many of you can say that you have always entered a public toilet that is immaculately clean?  If you can say yes, then I envy you!!   Just last two weeks,  a couple of friends and I entered a WC to be welcomed by a huge pile of S**T lying there in the toilet bowl of the first cubicle.  That was a whopper that nearly made us puke.  We went to the second cubicle and it wasn't as terrible as the first with bits and pieces of tissue paper scattered on the floor.  I went to the third and I was greeted by sanitary pads with fresh blood stains on it. These are a normal sight for me when I enter the public toilets here.  Today, it is a sanitary pad, tomorrow would be diapers lying there on the floor, the next day might be a condom I suppose apart from the cigarette butts or other forms of rubbish.  Has it ever occured to them the existance of a trash  can is for us to dispose our rubbish?  My children are aways reminded to use the trash can, and if they cannot find one , then they should hold on to it until they  do. Why is it that cleanliness which should be a part of our daily routine become something extremely difficult to carry out.  Is it a sign that Malaysians are simply unhygienic? Is cleanliness only compulsory when you are abroad, is it only part of a facade to blend in with our western counterparts?  

These are only a few examples out of the millions that I can think of .  I am not saying that I am a saint  for I am never one and I have had a few lapses here and there regarding the things I am  talking on now,  but I can guarantee you, they are but only unintentional! Children are children and what do they know most of the times  about  queing up or not cutting the queue and all as they rely closely on their elders, or most approapriately their parents to examplify good values for them to mimick.  Sadly, these are the values that are fast deteriorating among us!

Do not be offended,  I am merely talking on my personal experiences which may not be relevant at all to yours.  This is my plain ramblings for today. 

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder...

I asked my dearie if I could spend a whole week at my Mam's house in Sg. Tua before we head back to his hometown in Segamat so I could bring the kids on excursions here and also for the fact that I wanted to fulfill my insatiable lust for shopping to which he agreed.  I should be elated, him not being around to curb my ruthless spending ways giving me full authority to just shop, shop, shop and bring the kids around. 

He went back to Kerteh last night and today I was supposed to start my sessions of retail therapy, however, somehow I was feeling a bit low so I did not go out.  The only highlight was when I brought the kids to the swimming pool for a dip under the mild sunlight.  Qayyum can now swim without his floats, Iman is confident to be in the water that she has allowed me and her Alang and Uncle Chu to let her go and Khalida is a daredevil now and is fearless that she jumped in the pool expecting us to catch her, and not only that she is contented just bobbing up and down in the water like an apple in a tub. (wearing her floats, of course)

The kids have now retired and I am my own company.  I should be planning what I want to do tomorrow, where I want to go, what I want to buy but all those seem meaningless to me because I am yearning for him, my dearie!! Although having a girl's day out is a normal occurrence  back home in Kerteh, but at the end of the day, I know that I would be at home reaching out my arms to him when he returns from work. But today, my arms are vacant and no one else can fill in that void except for him.  I am aching, my heart is breaking!!! I miss him so...

It is ironic that I was the one who wanted to be here, now I only want to be there with him.  My life isn't complete today, I have got my children, my bundle of joy but it is incomplete without him, the savior of my soul, the pillar of my family.  Babes, I love you..just so you know!

Monday, November 23, 2009

A Surprising Surprise.

I recently had an enormous argument with my dearie over the fact that he did not get me a birthday present again this year. At first, I  managed to keep the feeling inside at the core of my heart but when he apologized for not getting me a card although he searched high and low during his lunch break, I  felt dejected and unappreciated among other things.  How could he have spent only 2 hours of his lunch break to look for a card when he could have started doing so 3 weeks prior to my day knowing how accommodating the area of Kerteh and Paka is when it comes to looking for nice things?  He could have bought me the card the week before as he was in KL on a meeting trip or even on the way back as KL has sooooooooooo many beautiful birthday cards available even in 7-Eleven.  Couldn't have he made the effort then? It is not as if I was asking for a Ferrari Boxter, a simple card was all required to put a smile on my face and to light up my day.

My mind kept telling me  it was wrong that he couldn't even buy me a simple card although we have had small tiffs over the same matter previously and that it was more so wrong that while I was still hurting inside, he could just completely ignore the feelings I had, thinking that we had resolved this issue!  How hard could it be to just appreciate your wife with a simple card?? It doesn't even cost as much as a diamond ring from Tiffany's!!  So,  two days after my birthday, this feeling that kept nagging inside of me erupted like Krakatoa with me  pouring out all that I felt  by saying that I was under appreciated and that he constantly took me for granted when I have done so much for him and for not getting my birthday card is not a small issue for a lady who has given him children and to leave her urban lifestyle for a life in Kerteh where it is so mundane that everything dies after the last ray of the sun is too much a sacrifice that doesn't deserve to get unnoticed!

Much to my surprise, things took a different twist.  Our anniversary was just a week after my birthday and I had learnt to expect nothing from him  through our last spat in order to secure my frail feelings from being hurt again and for the fact that I hate having arguments with him, who is the savior of my soul.   On that day after he came back from work, we simply exchanged anniversary wishes and loving kisses in the bedroom where I was busy on the Net and I had prepared to expect nothing, not even a card.  I returned to the computer and had the urge to ease myself.  As I turned back heading for the loo, there I saw it, this extremely large hamper containing a whole lot of beauty products  including a perfume I was eyeing  just a day before, was right there on his working table.  I just couldn't believe my eyes, went over to it to inspect the details of the hamper and much to my surprise, there was a card with beautiful and simple words from his heart confirming that the hamper was for me,  for my 9th year anniversary!! Now, that's what I call a surprise. Something totally unexpected was expecting me!

I thanked him by showering him with a million kisses and he could definitely see how estatical I was.  When I told him that I wasn't expecting something at all , he simply uttered, it was his intent and that it was all part of the unexpected surprise.  He does have a point there..come to think of it, if my birthday and anniversary gifts are handed to me on the dot exactly when I was expecting it,  where is the  element of  surprise  there? Next year, on my birthday, I shall be expecting that unexpected surprise even if the feeling is torturous!!!  Or...hmmm...based on past years track record..maybe NOT! Who knows? ;)

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Fiza's Recipe...

I was reading Fiza's blog the other day and I saw her post a recipe on a cheesecake.  It looked easy to make and I had the urge to try it.  Although the ingredients weren't extravagant unlike the ones I typically do but it sure tasted wonderful and was much easier on the cash flow!  A very simple recipe that  produced such a divine taste with a creamy texture that suited my palate well.  

However, since I did not know what base Fiza used, I decided to use a base  that I made on my own. The base was a chocolate cookie base which I added some walnuts to it.  Don't ask for the exact measurements because I only had my instincts to guide me through  but be sure to use enough butter to bind the base perfectly as opposed to what I did that resulted in a rather crumbly base.  Since I had some leftover blueberry filling from my previous order, I smothered some on the cookie base before pouring the batch of cream cheese over it and there were some left for the topping too. The result was a heavenly piece of cheesecake!!  So, thumbs up Fiza, for your recipe and thanks a bunch!!!

Into a square tin.

Having a steam bath.

The end result.

Nothing beats having a cheesecake laced with the exquisite taste of Kona coffee.

Friday, November 20, 2009

The Beginning of the End..

After 11 months of struggling and educating, the tears and the laughter from both teachers and students, today finally marks the end of the year's school term with the beginning of the final semester break. The cheers and chatterings of the students while they wait for the bus to ferry them home, teachers walking by hurriedly doing this and that to finish off what is left of their year long assignments, tense and stress are almost visible unlike how it was 11 months back.  

However, while one should be happy with a relaxation period of almost 45 days, the world does not seem too, ironically.  It was raining heavily today..the heaviest so far this year and it happened on the last day of school, it was as if the world was crying with us teachers..Yes, for a teacher, his/her life is for the students and for students, their future depends on the teachers. I weep silently in my heart simultaneously with the falling of the raindrops although I have a wide grin on my face as I wish my students well while I was lovingly embraced by them for the final time this year.  I shall miss them, their antics, their stubborness, their laziness apart from their attentiveness, their respect and their co-operation.   Well, hope to see them again next year..woah...another year of struggle and pain and tears and laughters and the list goes on and on...ooooohh  no!

Guess I shall stop missing them now and focus and enjoy this rare oppurtunity to be rid of them. Hehehe. Happy Holidays all teachers out there.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Easy Silence by Dixie Chicks

"Easy Silence"

When the calls and conversations
Accidents and accusations
Messages and misperceptions
Paralyze my mind

Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving
Burning fumes of gasoline
And everyone is running
And I come to find a refuge in the

Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

Monkeys on the barricades
Are warning us to back away
They form commissions trying to find
The next one they can crucify

And anger plays on every station
Answers only make more questions
I need something to believe in
Breathe in sanctuary in the

Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

Children lose their youth too soon
Watching war made us immune
And I've got all the world to lose
But I just want to hold on to the

Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me

The easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

I am not much of a poet, well to tell you the truth not one even But I sure am hell of a good listener and this is one song I just love!  If you can, look up for it and just lose yourself in its enthralling tune.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


Sighing, sighing and more sighing and that is what I have been up to lately! With the impending school holidays and the loads of unsettled paperworks, the form 4 analysis to be handed in to the JPN this Thursday(!!!!) while still 4 more classes out of the 6 haven't even submitted the marks to me, another round of chasing after the teachers to fill in the mark sheets without being hated for, time is extremely quickly catching up on me and I feel breathless!!!

I have been so busy that I have neglected my entire family and the worst is that I haven't been you know what with hubby dearie (will make up to him with some  mind-blowing ehem ehem some time next week..I hope) and I just love him for putting up with me, my tantrums and for having raised my voice at him due to the stress I am facing now.  Babes, you know I appreciate you a whole lot and I love you to bits for all the patience you have and for sticking by me especially through all the times when the monster wqithin me reveals itself. THANK YOU!! I LOVE YOU INFINITY!!!

Just the other day, I came back from my PMR meeting exhausted.  When I reached home, all I wanted to do was to shut myself out from the outside world and that is what I did exactly. I locked myself in my room and ignored everyone inhibiting my house, putting on a deaf ear to the bickerings and squabblings among the three children I produced.  3  hours later, when I was ready to face the earth, I saw my girls lying on the floor asleep in front of my bedroom  door and my boy watching over them. When I asked him why they were all there, he answered innocently  "Iman and Khalida missed you and wanted to wait for you.  I was taking care of them because when Ayah is not around, I'm the boss and I have to take care of everybody, right?" three little munchkins.  Even at this moment, I am missing them dearly even though they are just there on the bed not 2 feet away!

Gotta go to sleep...I am starting to string whatever words I can think of and don't know if I can make sense of myself.  Have to put on those running shoes tommorrow and forget the stilettos because there is gonna be some intensive chasing that I would have to do. Hope I get all the marks ..Goodnight, Sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

A Deal Gone Wrong..

I was interested to buy a piece of land measuring at 1764 metre square as an investment property which would cost me RM 80 000 in which, I consider cheap as compared to my 611 metres square land  that I bought for RM 52 000 to build my house.  With the land, I planned to divide it into 2 pieces that would measure up to 880 metres square each and get a hefty pay check out of it .  Unfortunately, my plan had turned into ashes today after a humiliating negotiation with the owner.

Now, for a small scale teacher like me, where would I foot the money to proceed with my purchase if not from a loan?  To make things worst, my broker told me that the man wanted 10% upfront to seal the deal.  I agreed to it although it would leave a huge hole in my pocket so I requested for the booking fee to be reduced to a more affordable 5k if it was possible.  Just this afternoon, I received an SMS from my broker saying that Hj Jalil insists that I pay the initial 10% and that the rest of the payment be made within 3 months and to my horror the offer of RM 80k is only valid until the end of the year.  With me intending  to take up a government loan and the efficiency of the government officers up there, I knew that 3 months would be impossible with the whole process that was due to be involved.  The application itself would take me a week, to send it to Putrajaya would take another and for the evaluators to come would take up to god knows how long, not to mention the processing of the loan itself were the RM 80k was deemed feasible but if not, then I would have to plead the remaining of it from both my hubby and my eldest sister.  So all in all,  I would need at most,  4 months to pay it up.

I called Hj Jalil myself to ask for his kind gesture to consider my position and lack of cash fund.  At first, he agreed on the minimum amount of RM 5k be paid in a week which brought a smile to my face thinking that I had managed to secure the land with the price tag on it.  After that, he asked how I intended to pay the balance and how long it would take me to do so and after telling him about the whole processes of the loan, he laughed and said that I had misunderstood him.  He said, "the price of RM 80k is only valid until the end of the year" meaning, that I would have to come up with the money by the end of the year and if  I failed to do so, the price would differ exactly on the 1st of January 2010 despite having paid the booking fee to my dismay.

He kept on telling me on how much he would lose with the current budget review on land ownership and the tax incurred on him yadda, yadda, yadda that bored me to death.  So, to cut to the chase, I told him to reconsider his decisions and to allow me to pay within 4 months with the price of RM 80k but he was adamant with the terms and conditions that he had set.  That's when I saw the prospect of the land being mine going into its early demise, so being one who would fight to my last breath, I thought of using reverse psychology on him. 

With that I said, 
" Tuan Haji, I know you are not desperate for money, and that you are tremendously fortunate to receive God's gift of wealth as opposed to me who is still struggling to accumulate mine." 
He cut off my words and said with a pride that was huge enough to put America, Canada and South America to shame.
" True, true, I am not desperate for money. Alhamdulillah ( Thanks to God!), Alhamdulillah, He has given me immense wealth" 
I said " I am just a humble teacher, so would you..." 
My words were cut off again with him saying,
'' So, you KENALAH kerja keras lagi! ( Therefore, you HAVE to work harder!)"  

And that brought out the devil in me and instantly like She-Ra, I was in the fighting mode! How dare he say such a thing? Does he think that teachers don't work hard enough to make ends meet? Are we that low in his eyes? However, when I started to say, " Haji ingat saya tak kerja keraa.."  He cut off my words again (too coward I guess to hear the truth of his cockiness be revealed bluntly to him) by saying, "Assalamualaikum." and instantly that man hung up on me!

So there goes, my 1764 metres square piece of land gone and my pride slightly dented.  I didn't mind him not wanting to succumb to my wishes, but for him to be so arrogant with the wealth he has and to look down on penniless creatures like me is something heart-wrenching.  Well, to look on the bright side, I managed to save RM 80k in the long run and he managed to earn none.  So I guess, I can still afford the Honda City I've been eyeing on for ages next year...haha, maybe not for I'm stingy with money, you see! 

This is my plain ramblings for today.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Rain, not go away!

It is that time of year already when the picturesque surroundings are blanketed by the dark and loomy mist and loses its sense of tranquility and when you would normally hear the chirpings of the birds flaunting their freedom, it is now replaced with the sounds of rain like a bagful of coins falling into a heap.

I absolutely love the rainy season because it somehow quietens any busy days, everyone seems depressed and you get to prolong the lurking deadlines just because people are not in the mood. But apart from getting away with my procastination, I simply love the rainy season because I get to run away from the world and lose touch of myself just by staring at the outside, looking deep into the wide open space and to detach yourself from being a part of the world that goes by is a treat in its own rite.

It is raining right now and the pitter patter of rain drops against my windowsill is completly alluring that I cannot resist  the temptation of having that long deserved rest. Hence, I better be on my way to bed, while it is still raining and the weather is just suitable for a long..long slumber! ZZZzzzzzz...

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Stupid Drivers!!!!

I love a bit of a challenge every once a while and I get mine from driving.  Having said that,  driving in Terengganu is one of the greatest challenge I have had so far!  I thought KL drivers were those to be intimidated by, well folks, you haven't encountered those in Terengganu yet! ( Mind you, I am not referring to the local Terenganus, but drivers in Terengganu as a whole, tak kiraler dari KL ker, Penang ker, Johor ke, Zimbabwe ke.but as long as you are in Terengganu).

Today, I was head of the line on the main road waiting for my turn to enter the school compound when this colleague of mine gladly cut my queue and went on in disregarding an oncoming motorcycle.  Now since we were heading for the same destination which was just a spit away and for the fact that she was only behind me, did she honestly think that her punch card would not turn red by being earlier than me for a mere 2 micro seconds..helllooooooo!!!! We were 20 minutes damn late already..funny isn't it, this mentality of some drivers.

Second,  I have this automatic sleep mode programmed inside of me when I drive because when the wheels turn less than 80km per hour, there it goes, on the dot, sleepiness  would creep zealously throughout my entire body paralyzing my limbs!!!! So, being on the FAST LANE..mind you which is on the RIGHT HAND SIDE would totally be my domain unless I see another vehicle that is going faster than mine, then I would go to the LEFT LANE which is TO MAINTAIN SPEED or TO DRIVE SLOW.  So, drivers out there, if you are feeling rotten for the day and need to drive at a murderous 30 or 40 kmph, kindly proceed to the left lane and not the right!!!!  And BTW, when someone gives you a double flash, it is only intended to inform you that you have been driving like a drunk snail for the past 5 minutes on a fast lane and not to initiate any fights!!

Still on the topic of being on the lanes, I think every car manufacturers have included signals in each of the cars that they have produced. Therefore, GODAMMIT, please use your signals when you are going to switch between the lanes.  I have to say that I am one of the unfortunate ones to not have ESP that would enable me to read your minds or the ability to see in the future and predict when you might want to go into the lane that I am in already.  It is just dangerous to suddenly cross over into another lane when another car is in a close distance without signalling others and even if you give the signal, please allow a 5 second grace period before you go into the lane.  Ini tak, dia ingat dia kasi signal dia boleh terus masuk depan kita..Silly, selfish schmucks!!

But what irks me the most is those who come out of a junction and drive slower than death itself.  Even if a car is speeding at 50 kmph, the impact it has when it bumps into another car is just unfathomable considering the lack of speed.  Watch National Goegraphic and just look at how that dummy's head fell off..and this is no laughing issue. Hmm..I think I'm lost for words..but I think you would know how the feeling is.

We are all payers of the road taxes and not one single soul can claim that the road belongs to their spouse or father or mother...well, unless you are Samy V's kid or wife of course..So, kick the habit of driving at your own ease when we have simple rules that we can abide to, to fit the individual drivers.

p/s Biler park kereta, diaorang nih suka sangatlah makan dua petak...kalau kereta dia besar gajah takper juga..but when you take half and half of each parking lots, susah tau orang lain...B****,****,*****..etc etc..Puas hati!